A (Surprisingly) Healthy Way to Argue

Believe it or not, I think this is a healthy way for two people, who have differences, to argue. Yup. It's healthy! In my experience, there's two ways Christians handle confrontation:

1: "Healthy Discussion": No one should yell or raise their voice, everyone should have a sweet, happy, patient, understanding tone, always smiling, never angry.

2: "Let God Deal with it": Never address the issue, pray for them, and don't say anything. Continue as if everything is ok.

(For the record, non-Christians do a variant of these two things, but since Ruslan and Marcus are both Christian, I'm just going to focus on Christians)

Because both of these options are passive aggressive, and, by its very nature, passive aggression doesn't directly address the problem, which means the problem rarely, if ever, gets solved. Conflict avoidance isn't healthy, and I feel a lot of Christians will look at the above video and point to it as an example of failure.

"THEY'RE YELLING AND RAISING THEIR VOICES!!!"

That's ok!

"THEY'RE ANGRY!"

That's ok!

There's nothing wrong with any of that.

These are two men attempting to resolve their issues with each other. They're getting everything off their chest, clarifying issues, and then, ultimately agreeing to disagree. You'll notice, there are "peaks and valleys" in the argument. They'll get loud, then get quiet, and this repeats, and at the end they compromise and, most importantly, they calm down.

They calm down. Why? Its the same reason, when boys are young, and they fight, and then (not all the time) become friends later. That, I don't know what to call it, I hate using the term energy because that words been hijacked lately... tension? smoke? whatever it is, its resolved, and now that it's resolved they can go about their way.

Sometimes you gotta fight it out, or, sometimes you gotta argue it out.

This isn’t wrong, it’s refreshing.

More on this later.